Welcome to the HOOVER of my Life!! Yup, it really SUX.

Been going through a bit of depression lately.  

I have never been so "out of pocket" since I was a teenager living on my own.  I recently made it through bankruptcy, trashed all the credit cards and the only thing left is my bank ATM, my monthly Social Security Deposit of about 2k to live on for the entire month.  Hard to believe I used to live on 2k every two weeks and most peeps were amazed I was comfortable at that meger amount with a full-blown geek career.

Got no more family, got no more friends except for maybe two. Birthday's around the corner and I just don't fucking care. Not thankful for a goddamn thing.  Read my lips, NOTHING.  Rather than voice my anger and disappointment out loud, I just sit silently.   There is zero benefit (besides sympathy) to sharing how I feel with others and I've never been a big fan of sympathy or those offering it.  No thank you, I'll do it myself.. blah blah blah blah...  Even if it kills me.

Over the past couple weeks, my sleep habits are fucked up.. Husband wants to start snoring at 9pm so I try to do the same only to find myself wide awake and ready to start the day at 1AM.  Da Faq?   Next thing ya know I'm tired at 10am and ready for a friggin nap.  Spend most of the day either behind a laptop in the living room or in bed.  What a fabulous life... NOT!   Worse, I seem to be the only one around here running dishwashers, laundry, yard crap, trash, and counting out coins from an old piggy bank so I can afford to buy milk for coffee.  How sad is this?

His Jeep sits idle in the garage with no money for registration or even gas for that matter.  The Harley and the Honda Helix sit uselessly and since neither run, they're probably worthless.  Even if I could peddle stuff on eBay how the fuck could I afford to mail it with an overdraft bank account and only $5 left in my pocket?  Yeah, trust me, people, there is no exaggeration going on here.  In fact, maybe a lot of glossing over shit that I don't even want to mention anymore.

So I sit and wait...  For what? I have no fucking idea!  

No money, no family, no social life, haven't even been to a gay bar in two years. So why do I continue reading the bullshit on FaceBook or watching the News?  Besides other people's misfortune, what benefit does it provide me?

The goddamn government threatens to punish me if I seek a part-time side job. Punish me with no health care or even reduction in my monthly 2K check.  So in a couple weeks I'm going to be 56 and living off $24,000 take home a month in a paid off house that costs $4,000 a year in taxes and have no idea how the hell that's going to materialize come next month (yeah, next month is December)  I'm willing to do something to change this but from every single goddamn direction there's nothing but a brick wall with zero solution to the tiny box I've gotten stuck in.   Thankful?  Really?    This is how we treat good people who help others all their life?  This is the price for independence?  This is freedom?  This is what happens to peeps who contribute large amounts of their weekly paychecks for false hope returns?

Sorry, but I'm really hating life right now... If you can call it that.  Those I cared for and trusted have done such a great job of letting me down.  Even my husband hasn't physically touched me in a decade though we sleep in the same fucking bed separated by critters with the excuse that my body is too damn hot to cuddle with or a dick that won't get hard enough to fuck.  Wow, gee thanks.  Be strong Rik, Be strong...  Why? Who The Fuck Knows or Cares...    Yup, wash, rinse, repeat.

Someone remind me why I continue to wake up each day? What is my purpose? Yup, happy Birthday to me,  Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas to the rest of Y'all.    WHATEVER!    Says the man who feels unloved and without a purpose on Tuesday, November 14, 2017 @ 3.:33AM

UPDATED MY WEBSITE

Well, it took awhile, had to fight crashed databases, mucked up scrambled config files and all sorts of other nasties but I finally added/updated the link to this blog. (Oh Joy, Big Deal So What?) Now it will be interesting to see if there are any readers out there.  I'll think positive but I'm not going to expect much based on past letdowns. 

Whatever, at least it's a place I can post stuff and remain in control of it all avoiding the status quo censorship crap.  I've gotten sick of people warning me about youngsters using FB knowing that by the time said youngsters reach the minimum required 17 years of age. Most have come into contact with far worse.  But I digress, so now I have a place of my very own where I can write or post whatever the fuck I want without digital hand slapping...

FABREZE - Cuz some of the things you like Stink!!

Have you seen the new TV commercial yet?

FABREZE COMMERCIAL: - Cuz some of the things 'you like' Stink!! --->>> Does this go for ASSHOLES and gay men?? What's that smell???

Dick-In-A-Box sounds better than Grindr or Tinder

Dick-In-A-Box sounds better than Grindr or Tinder

posted Sep 4, 2017, 4:04 AM by Rik Wallin

If Jack In The Box is for food and sandwiches why not Dick In The Box for Sex and Blowjobs?  Doesn't it make more sense?  I mean really, no need for hidden innuendo in wording.  Don't like the word Dick? How about Cock? After all, it's the thing rural peeps wake up listening to each morning and Men all over the world wake up to calling it 'Morning Wood' don't they?? Instead, people who don't like the "vulgarity" of words (which I think is absolutely stupid) go far and out of their way to sprinkle glitter on things they don't like in the concept is more accepting.  Why?  Da'FuQ???   With all this horseshit, how come religion never had a commandment with 'Thou Shalt Not Use Yucky Words' since so many take such offense?  Or, maybe 'Thou Shalt Not Listen To Yucky Words' might be better for some.  Wouldn't want God to send you to Hail for sayin' Yucky words now would ya??

Free Social Sites for Adults

Free Social Sites for Adults

posted May 14, 2017, 10:26 PM by Rik Wallin

As a gay dude you can probably guess that I have my share of dude porn stored on various hard drives. I've been working for a past few days trying to build my own Bulletin Board type systems that won't smack my hands and cut me off for showing a picture of a man's dick in another man's mouth.  So I thought I'd try my luck at running and building my own phpBB on my own net server space.  It came along nicely till I learned that I could only contribute the types of files they chose and reprimanded for trying to post a couple shared videos.   From there I went to Google's Blogger.. no luck there either.. and then I finally settled with Tumblr which doesn't censor your shit.  So far, so good and if all goes well over the new few days I'll have the official "RumpRangers" site online soon.  https://www.tumblr.com/login_required/rumprangers

Mother's Day Is Right Around The Corner

Mother's Day Is Right Around The Corner

posted May 10, 2017, 11:57 AM by Rik Wallin   [ updated May 10, 2017, 12:14 PM ]

This coming weekend is Mom's day and this time I'm not all melancholy or sad about my mom's passing. I do find it sad that I have absolutely no ties to any of my family members  and think it's sad that things could have gotten so bad all over a political gaff and snarky remark. In my early teen days, my bro and sis used to get dragged everywhere with me because mom and dad were stuck working and couldn't afford care peeps to step in.  Yup, it was all me.. the dishwasher, laundry dude, the supper maker, the homework helper etc.  Nope, I wasn't some kind of saint so don't be putting me on on some kind or pedestal. I had my share of crazy drinking and pot smoking nights when I just had to get away from absolutely everything and everyone I called family.  I had no intention of being a 24 hour care giver at age 17 when I had my own life to life but I still got by.  So this year instead of being all mushy and stuff I'm thankful for the upbringing I had and thankful that I learned to grow up at a very early age making my own life decisions. (Thanks Mom!). I never did have much of a father per-se so that lady was the do all in my case. Since their pot and cocaine addicted father was never around I guess that made me the substitute instead.  Now here we all all these years later through all the dramas and crap and just when you think you got it all down you wake up one morning and realize that you have no longer have any connection to the people you thought were your family. Sure I might be one of a kind in that regard because they all came from different marriages and fathers but it seemed really odd how not even a birthday or Christmas greeting in over a year makes you realize the lack of importance in it all.  When I moved to California I was 3100 miles away and only got the rare phone call or card for three years. Then moved back and felt not much less distant living right in the same state only to be changed again with the move to Texas.  So WTF, big deal so what... They never paid my rent, or bought my food, or stood there in support during my times of need.  Should I really feel sad over the way things have become at this time or take it as a blessing. Less money on gifts, less energy wasted on family drama and certainly no more disappointment.  So yeah, happy Mother's Day!  Thanks Mom for all you taught me and sorry I couldn't have passed it on better to your other kids and grandkids.  I know all too well about the 'hard school of knocks' and now they can enjoy experiencing it too.   Right now I'm staying busy rebuilding a hand-me-down iMAC, filtering all the bundles of crap saved from the Priscilla RV still cluttered in the back yard and taking a moment to appreciate my own self worth and my recovery from one of the most darkest times of my life.  Yeah, this memorial day weekend makes it 15 years that I was in Parkland Hospital in a coma after being hit by a drunk on my motorcycle. I guess in many ways I was able to beat all the odds but in the process of the hard road of recovery I learned more about the human element than expected.  As you know, opinions are like assholes cuz everyone's got one.  Why do so many seek approval from others in their choices? What benefit does this create?  In my case not doing so gives me extra power to focus forward rather than the spectators around me.  In any case reader, (I doubt anyone's out there) take it all in stride and do an inventory of yourself now and then. Do it alone and quietly and it may very well help you in your future travels.  Blessings and Peace OUT Y'all...

Without HIV there would be no Gay Hate

Without HIV there would be no Gay Hate

posted Mar 6, 2017, 8:34 AM by Rik Wallin

Do you realize based on the current state of things, there probably wouldn't be much hate for gays as there is today if we never encountered HIV.  No fear, no hiding, etc.  Just a couple dudes busting a nut and keeping the pregnancy rate low. Pulling the religion card would more or less just backfire and blow up in their faces if you did away with the fear factor of sodom and grimora blah blah blah. Ya feel what I'm getting at?  Do you see how our human race uses the element of fear to get people to move in the same direction whether they like it or not? I think it's funny how everyone always wants to compete to be "the authority" of an issue and once they get there all they want is for the world to leave them alone.   Yup, Irony sure does have it's set of amusing features.  Too bad more peeps are too blind to see it.